The Festival of Stupidity

Dedicated to the celebration of the fools in our lives.

The Duhs

It will be interesting to see how long this list gets, won't it?

Here are what I call "the duhs", little things that should be obvious, but which apparently are not. If you have a candidate for "the duhs" drop me a line and share it. Note that some duhs are slightly repetitious;  yes, this is intentional. Please refer to why I created this site and my love of sarcasm for questions.

The Duhs

Big Duh #1:  I don't make your future; you do.

Big Duh #2:  If someone has to be on the verge of losing you before they can act like they care, they've never really loved you at all.

Big Duh #3:   Premonitions: The uncomfortable future truth. Don't like'em, don't ask about'em.

Big Duh #4:    If you don't want to know something, don't ask about it.

Big Duh #5:    If you don't want the truth, don't lie and say that you do.

Big Duh #6:    Complaining to other people will not change my opinions, visions, or dreams.

Big Duh #7:    Since you didn't have the vision, how can you say what it was?

Big Duh #8:    Never assume that because the only sides of a person you've ever seen are sweetness and apparent sincerity, that he/she can't be thoughtless, rude, shallow, and fake.

Big Duh #9:    Respect and loyalty that are fake are not respect and loyalty.

Big Duh #10:   I don't try to convince you you don't experience what you say you do, so don't try to tell me what I do or do not perceive.

Big Duh #11:   Knowledge is power--be sure you have plenty before you start any debate.

Big Duh #12:   No, it is not possible to be a "Christian Pagan", an "EpiscoPagan" or any other screwy combination of Christian and Pagan. These are not my rules (although why the hell any Pagan would want to claim Christianity as her own is completely frigging beyond me), they are the laws, the tenets, the rules of Christianity.

Big Duh #13:   You can call yourself whatever you want to.

Big Duh #14:   Just because you call yourself something, doesn't make that something right or true or real.

Big Duh #15:  If your name is Carol H., your comments are going directly into the trash. You know why.

Big Duh #16:  You were clearly warned that this site contained offensive material; moaning about it doesn't change the fact that you kept on reading after you were warned.

Big Duh #17:  Just because a preacher yaps about it for two hours on Sunday doesn't make it true.

Big Duh #18:  The Christian Bible belongs in the mythology section of bookstores.

Big Duh #19:  No, Real Jesus, the one who actually lived, was not born on Christmas Day.

Big Duh #20:  No, Real Mary, the Real Mother of Real Jesus, was not a virgin when she gave birth to him.

Big Duh #21:  It benefits the Christian Church if you mindlessly follow their teachings, so be sure you don't trouble yourself to research and study the truth.

Big Duh #22:  Yes, I would like my frigging milk in a bag, dammit.

Big Duh #23:   No, my pentacle necklace is not a sign that I'm an agent of Satan; I'm afraid his minions are in your church, not mine.

Big Duh #24:  Being a Mensa member does not automatically guarantee you two Ph.D.'s and a seven-figure annual salary.

Big Duh #25:  No number of Ph.D.'s can grant you common sense.

Big Duh #26:  No, polyamorists aren't pedophiles. We simply believe that love between consenting adults cannot be limited by gender or number.

Big Duh #27:  Yes, your government is keeping things from you. It's the nature of the bureaucratic beast that a powerful few control the lives and information of the powerless many.

Big Duh #28:   No, my IQ did not drop the day I became physically disabled.

Big Duh #29:   Length, color, and style of hair do not indicate a person's IQ.

Big Duh #30:   Just because you say something isn't real doesn't mean it isn't.

Big Duh #31:   I only tell you about my visions and dreams and premonitions because I frigging care.

Big Duh #32:   No, we're not turned on when men rearrange their balls in public or perform the crotch scratch.  No one is.

Big Duh #33:   No, I am not ashamed that I was once a stripper.

Big Duh #34:   Taking legally owned guns away from their law-abiding owners will not stop criminals from obtaining, carrying, or using firearms of any sort. Gods, that's a double figging duh.

Big Duh #35:   I may not like or agree with your religion, but I will always defend your right to your own religious beliefs and preferences.

Big Duh #36:   And I will always respect your right to pursue said nutty religion.

Big Duh #37:   If the Federal Reserve is closed on Thursday, that does not affect my direct deposit on Tuesday.

Big Duh #38:   Sex between consenting adults is not a bad thing, a perverted thing, or some hideous act we should be ashamed to admit we ever engage in.

Big Duh #39:    How did I get my hair this long? I let it grow, not cut it. Duh.

Big Duh #40:    Christians do not own the words "religious" and "faith"; Pagans are every bit as "religious" and have just as much (actually, usually more) "faith".

Big Duh #41:    The Wiki isn't always correct or even complete in the details provided.